An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were sitting in a bar,
drinking (as they do), and discussing how stupid their wives were.
The Englishman says, “I tell you, my wife is so stupid. Last week she went to the supermarket and bought $300 worth of meat because it was on sale, and we don’t even have a fridge to keep it in.”
Rev. Ian Paisley dies and approaches the pearly gates. St. Peter stops him. “You can’t get in here” says Peter.
“Why not” says Paisley. I’ve been a good Christian man all my life” Continue reading
Posted in Religious
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, “If I give
you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?” Continue reading
: / \ DO RE MI by Homer J. Simpson.
: | __ __)
: | / \/ \ DO…… the stuff…that buys me beer…
: /\/\ (o )o ) RAY….. the guy that sells me beer…
: /c \__/ –. ME…… the guy… who drinks the beer,
: ( ) FA…… a long way to get beer…
: \_ _——-‘ SO…… I’ll have another beer…
: | / \ LA…… I’ll have another beer…
: | | ‘\_______) TEA….. no thanks, I’m drinking beer…
: | \_____) That will bring us back to…
: |_____ | (Looks into an empty glass)
: / \ D’OH!
A GALWAY councillor has refused to apologise for swearing at a County Council committee meeting after he told a fellow councillor to “go **** himself”
Local area councillor Seamus Tiernan made the amazing outburst after he was told he was a “feckin eejit” for thinking that cloud computing was only suitable in areas with lots of rain.
He had told the Infrastructure Committee meeting this week that his native Connemara would be ideal for cloud computing because it has heavy cloud cover for nine months of the year.”
The Independent councillor said that the Government should be doing more to harness clean industries for the Connemara area and he named wind energy and cloud computing as two obvious examples.
“Connemara in particular could become a centre of excellence for wind energy harnessing, as it is open to the Atlantic. Also in terms of cloud computing, we have dense thick fog for nine months of the year, because of the mountain heights and the ability to harness this cloud power, there is tremendous scope for cloud computing to become a major employer in this region.”
However his mistake was pointed out by an incredulous Cllr Martin Shiels who said that “this is taking the biscuit. I’ve heard it all now. You must be a fecking eejit to think that the cloud computing had anything to do with climate.”
Cllr Tiernan took umbrage at the remarks of his colleague and called for them to be withdrawn. When Cllr Shields refused to do so, Tiernan said “go **** yourself, Cllr Shields.”
Chairman Sile Ni Baoill asked for both councillors to withdraw their comments, but Cllr Tiernan was repentant that Cllr Shields was wrong and that cloud computing is linked to cloud cover.
Small Ad Section – Local Newspaper.
For sale: R.D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Phone 948-0707 after 7 P.M. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him cheap. Continue reading
VIOLENCE DELAYS PEACE – LENIHAN
Irish Times Continue reading